Fun in English

1.🌀Leave applications.🌀  
2.(murdering english language)
3.🌀Infosys, Bangalore:🌀
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife ,
please sanction me one-week leave."
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🌀Oracle, Bangalore:🌀
From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:
"As I want to shave my son's head , please leave me for two days.."
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🌀Leave-letter from a CDAC employee who was
performing his daughter's wedding:
"As I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
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🌀From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it please grant me 10 days leave."
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🌀Another employee applied for half-day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o'clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
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🌀A leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day holiday."
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🌀A leave letter to a headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
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🌀Another letter written to a headmaster:
"As my headache is paining , please grant me leave for the day."
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🌀Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
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🌀Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above , please refer to my bottom..."
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🌀Actual application for leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
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🌀Letter writing:
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well "😂
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. ..
4.One sick leave letter from Mr  Chimanrao   to his  Higher officials in British India
5.Dear officer Saheb
 Sending you this leave  letter
I will  not come  as my  eyes have come  '  if I come with  my  eyes coming  then  your eyes  will come  & you will not come  as  then  Still   if you  come with  your  coming  eyes all eyes  will come  & all  will not  come  . so  I will  not come   and all  will  come .  I  will come  back  when  my  coming eyes  will  go & all will  come  without their eyes coming
yours  Sincerely
Mr Chimanrao   Chitnis
6.Terrible english by PT sir:
7.1) There is no wind in the football..
2) I talk, he talk, why you middle talk?.
3) You rotate the ground 4 times..
4) You go and understand the tree.
5) I'll give you clap on ur cheeks..
6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father.
7) Close the window airforce is coming.
8) I have two daughters and both are girls..
9) Stand in a straight circle..
10) Don't stand in front of my back
11) Why Haircut not cut..?
12) Don't make noise.. principle is rotating in the corridor
13) Why are you looking at the monkey outside the window when I’m here?
14) You talking bad habit
15) Give me a red pen of any colour.
16) Can i have some snow in my cold drink?
17) Pick the paper and fall into the dustbin.
18) Both of u stand together seperately.
19) Keep quiet the principal just passed away!!😄😄😄

English vhinglish

English Vinglish
Can any one say the difference between 'Complete' and 'Finished'?
No dictionary has ever been able to define the difference between 'Complete' and 'Finished.'
However, in a linguistic conference, held in London England, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese, was the clever winner.
His final challenge was this. Some say there is no difference between 'Complete' and 'Finished.' Please explain the difference in a way that is easy to understand.
His response was: When you marry the right woman, you are 'Complete.' If you marry the wrong woman, you are 'Finished.' And, when the right woman catches you with the wrong woman, you are 'Completely Finished.'
His answer received a five minute standing ovation.